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Zombies to Attack!

Hauntmaster, 08/16/2006

If you've been itching at your fetid decaying limbs, wishing for a chance to get out on the streets of San Francisco with your brethren and turn the residents of the city by the bay into a moaning, foot dragging, legion of undead you won't have to wait very long.

We've been reliably informed by top scientists from the Lick Observatory and a psychic we found by the dumpster at the Daly City BART station that cosmic dust from the recent Perseids meteor shower combined with emanations from the waning crescent moon and intensified by the upcoming alignment of Mercury, Saturn and Venus will cause zombies from all over the city to rise up and have an uncontrollable urge to assemble at the corner of Market and Sansome Streets on Saturday, August 19th at 2:30 pm.

If you're an anxious zombie or a member of Civil Defense wanting to anticipate the movements of this zombie mob you should visit EatBrains.com for additional information including their projected route and possible sites of major human/undead conflict.


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